The Faces of Forgiveness
A few weeks ago, I was asked to explain how we are to behave
toward someone after forgiving them for a painful trespass
against us. The question was "Are we to allow them back
into our lives, knowing the possibility of reoccurrence is
strong?" or " Can we choose to no longer make
them a part of our life without feeling we are fearful
or judgmental?"
I
found this difficult to answer immediately. After much research
and prayer, I felt led to write this column.
In our world today each of us are continually made aware
of the heinous events happening daily. Prejudice and Intolerance
is widespread. The cruel despots of hatred are flagrant,
ever ready to sway the mind and blind us to the existence
of the good available to us. We must remember it is our
distinctive way of thinking and believing that influences how
we judge or misjudge others.
We need to
be able to differentiate between the two vindication methods
we find expressed. The "an eye for an eye and
a tooth for a tooth," prevailed when the human race
lived in ignorance of its relationship to one another.
When fear, power and judgement were predominate in most
circumstances. Then came "If a man shall strike
you on one cheek, turn the other," "Love your
neighbor as yourself." This
is the method Jesus taught. One expresses Love the other
Hatred. It is for us to choose which method to employ.
To choose love is to choose forgiveness.
Also let us explore the following clause from "The
Lord's Prayer." "Forgive
us our debts, as we also have forgiven our debtors." (Matt.
6:12) NIV. With this in mind I recalled something the author
Emmet Fox wrote on this phrase in his book Sermon
on the Mount. "Notice that Jesus does not
say, 'forgive me my trespasses and I will try to forgive
others,' or 'I
will see if it can be done,' or 'I will forgive
generally, with certain exceptions.' He obliges
us to declare that we have actually forgiven, and
forgiven all, and he makes our claim to our own forgiveness
to depend upon that."
Just how
is this magic act of forgiveness to be accomplished?
Seems to be a constant question. How often do you
find yourself saying, "I really want to forgive,
but I just can't, the injustice was too great."
To quote Mr.
Fox, "The technique of forgiveness is simple enough, and not
very difficult to manage when you understand how. The only thing
that is essential is willingness to forgive. Provided you
desire to forgive the offender, the greater part of the work is already
done. People have always made such a bogey of forgiveness because
they have been under the erroneous impression that to forgive a person
means that you have to compel yourself to like him or her. Happily
this is by no means the case — we are not called upon to like
anyone whom we do not find ourselves liking spontaneously."
There are many other examples and
forms of Forgiveness, I would like to touch upon one other, forgiving
those we perceive as different from us or who we have judged as wrong
in their actions. We must let go of this belief and forgive. It is
then we experience God's cleansing power and the richness of
spiritual substance enters our mind and heart.
Everyone
should practice general forgiveness each day as a matter
of course. Simply say; "I freely forgive everyone." Then
in the course of the day, should a thought of grievance or
resentment come up, bless the offender briefly and dismiss
the thought.
The result of this continual practice will be
that very soon you will find yourself cleared of all resentment
and condemnation, and the effect upon your health, happiness,
and your general life will be nothing less than transcendent.
Blessings,
Rev. Paulette
